Posts Tagged ‘Kevin Hernandez’

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Can we just forgive Mel Gibson already?

I know he made The Passion of the Christ, but I can forgive him for that.

Oh yeah, there’s all that racist stuff too. But he was drunk! Who among us hasn’t said some stupid shit when we’re drunk? I regret virtually everything I’ve ever done when drunk. There’s a kernel of truth in the saying that the real person reveals themselves when intoxicated. As a fan, I’m happy to have Mel Gibson back in my life.

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Get the Gringo is Mel Gibson at his best. His booze-soaked, chain-smoking best.

The premise is stunningly simple. Mel Gibson’s character is simply known as either the Driver or Gringo. He was the getaway driver of a robbery gone bad. Get the Gringo opens with the Driver leading the police on a chase with a dying accomplice bleeding all over the millions in their car. In a last-ditch attemptr, the Driver evades the cops and crashes the car into and over the border wall in order to get easier treatment in Mexico. The laughably corrupt Mexican cops that catch him take the millions in stolen money and throw the Driver into their shitty prison system on false charges—hoping to bury him forever. The setup of the story is nice and breezy.

Essentially, this is a revenge movie where Mel Gibson makes sure his enemies get their comeuppance. And oh shit, comeuppance is had. Mel’s character is the only white guy (hence, the Gringo) locked up in El Pueblito, which is a Mexican prison where the inmates run the asylum. If you have enough money, you can bring your family into the prison to live with you—while the kids can even continue going to school on the outside. The Gringo gets the lay of the land and starts to exploit his surroundings to improve his stature in the prison.

Get the Gringo has an enjoyable pace, but I found myself more in love with the acting than the actual story. Mel Gibson exudes charisma. This is the typical kind of gruff character that Mel Gibson knocks out of the park. Despite being an arguably shitty human being, I find Mel Gibson to be an extremely likeable actor.

the-driver-and-the-kid

As great as Mel Gibson is in Get the Gringo, this movie is so memorable because of the Kid (played by Kevin Hernandez). I’ve seen Kevin Hernandez is a few things since this movie, but Get the Gringo will likely be the height of his career. Honestly, it feels like one of the best performances from a young child actor. The Kid has special privileges in El Pueblito because he is the only match for a liver transplant that the criminal leader of the prison, Javi (played by Daniel Giménez Cacho) needs—due to all of his drinking. No one can touch the Kid, and he can’t leave like the other kids. The budding friendship between the Gringo and the Kid is the highlight of this movie.

Most child actors are shit. I think reasonable people can agree about that. They’re kids, they can’t be trusted to be any good. What child should be working at that age? However, Kevin Hernandez perfectly encapsulates this character. He’s a wise-cracking, tough kid on the outside, but you can see he is scared to death on the inside. In his current circumstances, there’s nothing the Kid can do to save himself or his mother. But he wants to try to do so by killing Javi. He has no choice. His liver is no longer his own. Once Javi gives the go-ahead, they’ll cut the liver out of the Kid and transplant it into Javi so he can ruin another this one too with his binge drinking.

Naturally, the story snowballs and you find out more about the robbery gone bad. The Gringo stole those millions from an evil fuck named Frank (played by master of greasy creepitude, Peter Stormare). Frank wants that fucking money back. Nothing will stop him. Get the Gringo is wise to let Stormare chew scenery and gloriously over-act. Peter Stormare is phenomenal in everything, and I will fight you if you disagree.

There’s a few other solid performances from supporting actors, but the biggest secondary contribution comes from Peter Gerety. If the name isn’t familiar, maybe the many chins of Peter Gerety will remind you that he was the hefty Judge Phelan in The Wire. I’ve been grossed out by Gerety ever since I heard his character in The Wire say he “would love to throw a fuck” into a female character. The mental image that conjured will haunt my nightmares. Gerety is operating at peak creepiness as the Embassy Guy poking around in the Gringo’s business.

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Get the Gringo is a fun action adventure. This is the exact fucking type of movie that we as a nation have missed out on in the name of morality. Most people in the movie business are probably pieces of shit. I don’t care. Movies aren’t real. I can disassociate someone’s real life from what’s happening on a screen. It’s acting. Some people are weirded out by Tom Cruise now. Like Mel Gibson, Tom Cruise exudes charisma and he’s always entertaining in movies.

Maybe Mel Gibson still is a piece of shit. But people can change. His past, present, or future isn’t going to impact my enjoyment of his films. Get the Gringo is a fine example of the pure fun that we can have from watching Mel Gibson get back to work. Give the man some room to breathe and the freedom to perfect his craft.

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4.5 out of 5 stars

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Sex Ed is a poor man’s The 40-Year-Old Virgin combined with School of Rock.

Haley Joel Osment plays the titular Ed. I didn’t even realize the monumentally stupid pun in the title because I never bothered to pay attention to the character’s name while watching the movie. I could only see Haley Joel Osment, not the character. Ed Cole is a first-time teacher at an inner city after school program for middle school students. Since the kids have no one to teach them sexual education, Eddie decides to be the one to educate them—despite the fact that he’s never actually had sex.

This is fucking spot-on casting. Haley Joel Osment is the most believable virgin.

Sex Ed Cole

I think we can all agree that Haley Joel Osment is not a leading man. He looks like a man-child. It’s probably not fair to child actors, but I feel like it’s impossible for us (the general public) to forget the image we have of them as a child. Haley Joel Osment’s face looks like a shrunken face meme. The size and proportion of his eyes, nose, and mouth look the exact same as a child and adult.

It feels weird that I am the same age as Haley Joel Osment. Because of his tremendous success as a child actor, it just feels like he has been around forever. Haley Joel still has those acting chops. Sex Ed is a charming, engaging comedy that works because of his comedic timing and ability to make you sympathize with his situation. Eddie isn’t a bad guy at all. But he manages to fuck up any opportunity that is presented. He’s a lovable dofus, which is why Haley Joel Osment is a perfect fit.

Short Sleeves

Haley Joel Osment looks like he came out of the womb wearing a short-sleeve dress shirt.

Sex Ed wisely realized the unintentional comedic gold they had on their hands with Haley Joel Osment, and this movie utilizes that extremely well with a childish haircut, goofy sunglasses, and a myriad of short-sleeves. While Haley Joel is the main reason to watch this movie, the supporting cast is surprisingly good. Ed’s best friend is a sex fiend named JT who is played tremendously by Glen Powell. JT is a charismatic weirdo that somehow maintains a fairly normal relationship with his steady girlfriend—Ally, played by Castille Landon. I have no idea if Powell possesses any range, but he is fantastic in this comedic niche. Powell pops whenever he’s on the screen so watch out for him in the future.

Glen Powell

While most of the young actors portraying the students were forgettable, Kevin Hernandez is outstanding as Tito—the younger brother of Haley Joel’s love interest, Pilar. I recognized Kevin Hernandez from Get the Gringo, which is a superb Mel Gibson movie still streaming on Netflix. And he plays a minor role in Short Term 12 (also streaming). In Get the Gringo and Short Term 12, he is basically still a child and is remarkable in those dramatic roles. In Sex Ed, Kevin Hernandez shows his comedic chops by playing a constantly horny teenager who needs Haley Joel’s guidance—ignoring that he’s arguably more experienced than Ed. I think this movie made such a tired old premise succeed because they packed as much comedy as possible into small moments with really good actors.

The other noteworthy supporting cast members were Matt Walsh as Washout, Ray Santiago as Hector, and Chris Williams as Reverend Marcus Hamilton. Matt Walsh is a great improv artist and he delivers his staple awkward comedy when interviewing Haley Joel’s character for the teaching position. You may not know him by name, but you have seen Matt Walsh in one of his million bit roles. If you watch one of the best shows on television, Ash vs. Evil Dead, then Ray Santiago should be familiar from his part as Pablo (Ash’s sidekick). Hector is a different role for Ray Santiago because he’s playing more of a macho tough guy as Pilar’s boyfriend, and he’s a total dick whenever Haley Joel sniffs around. Chris Williams has also played a million different roles, but I’ll always refer to him as Krazee-Eyez Killa from one of the most memorable episodes of Curb Your Enthusiasm. In Sex Ed, Chris Williams plays the religious parent opposed to Ed’s sexual education of minors. There’s not much scenery for Williams to chew in this straight-laced role, but he serves his part as a plot device to further the story.

30-Year-Old Virgin

Again, Sex Ed isn’t breaking any conventions or doing anything new. But it still holds up on a repeat viewing as an above-average modern comedy. Particularly with this subject matter, the writer (Bill Kennedy) and director (Isaac Feder) should have pushed the envelope more to the ridiculously fun and raunchy. Although they decided to be reserved, the movie was begging for more absurdity.

If you think back on 40-Year-Old Virgin, there are several scenes of Steve Carrell fumbling around awkwardly trying to have sex. I’m not saying I wanted some big-boobed bimbo smacking Haley Joel Osment in the face with her tits, but I wanted to see them exploit what people like me think of him—as a child actor in so many memorable movies like Forrest Gump, The Sixth Sense, Pay It Forward, and even A.I. Artificial Intelligence. I’m sure Haley Joel would like to break that squeaky clean image.

On Netflix, it is slim pickings in terms of quality comedies. Most of my highest-rated comedies are stand-up performances or dark comedies. If you’re looking for some cheap laughs, Sex Ed is at least an option to throw on and enjoy laughing with and at Haley Joel Osment.

I mean, look at this fucking guy.

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Creepy Haley Joel

3 out of 5 stars