Posts Tagged ‘Week 15’

Overall: 128-80
Last Week: 10-6

Buccaneers @ Rams

This could and should be the last game the Rams play in St. Louis, which is a shithole of appropriate proportions. It’s not quite at the epic status of Cleveland or any other city in Ohio, but St. Louis is on the fast track to that fate if they publicly finance a stadium for this awful football team. The economic impact from a publicly financed stadium is negligible. With 8 home games a year, a stadium paid for by taxpayers isn’t going to suddenly bring in a boatload of money or create meaningful jobs. Billionaires are billionaires for a reason. Stan Kroenke and the NFL can afford to build their own stadium without having the public foot a large, substantial portion of the bill. It’s all about city pride. It will say a lot about St. Louis if they give in and let the NFL force them to finance an ugly new venue in their old ugly city. The Rams suck and have sucked for so long. Just let them go. You can’t convince me people truly care about this franchise.

Win: St. Louis Rams

Jets @ Cowboys

Have we seen the last of Jason Garrett in Dallas? You can’t blame the ginger for having Brandon Weeden as his backup QB (unless he campaigned in solidarity with his orange-haired brethren), but the Cowboys’ inability to play football without Tony Romo has been very apparent. After years of sticking with Garrett and reducing his responsibilities, Jerry Jones gave him Brandon Weeden and Matt Cassell as QB depth while also sabotaging the coach’s authority by signing Greg Hardy and making excuses every week for why he’s an asshole. Now Sean Payton is set to be a FA coach and a reunion with the Cowboys makes as much sense as anything else. I still think Payton will settle in popping pills on South Beach, but I wouldn’t be surprised by anything—including Johnny Manziel joining his hometown Cowboys.

Win: New York Jets

Texans @ Colts

Any time Clipboard Jesus has an actual opportunity to enter the game, then you know the Colts are in serious trouble. Indianapolis still doesn’t have Andrew Luck back and their defense continues to somehow get worse. Now there’s a realistic chance the Texans or even Jaguars could win the AFC South. What a clusterfuck of an NFL season. Can we just fast forward to the championship games?

Win: Houston Texans

Bears @ Vikings

Minnesota can’t upset the likes of Green Bay or Arizona, but the Vikings should pillage the village of Chicago and maul the Bears. When Jay Cutler sees his breath in the cold air this time of year, it just reminds him how he would rather be chain-smoking cigarettes than playing football.

Win: Minnesota Vikings

Titans @ Patriots

Fuck Tom Brady. Even in an alternate universe, New England is not losing to the Tennessee Titans.

Win: New England Patriots

Panthers @ Giants

Carolina is rolling and has a genuine opportunity to end the regular season undefeated. It makes no sense to select the Giants as the team to end the streak. But Eli can get hot and Odell Beckham could demolish everyone in the Panthers secondary—including semi-god Josh Norman. Jonathan Stewart is injured, which could seriously threaten Carolina’s ability to move the ball without Cam Newton. Of course, Black Superman could just punish New York on the ground by himself. It won’t be a popular pick, but I’ll go with dumb luck and hope this is the week where I catch the Giants on the winning side of the teeter-totter. Admit it, you would prefer to see that beady-eyed, tattered old teddy bear Tom Coughlin and Eli Manning in the playoffs than Jon Gruden’s fat, angry dysfunctional brother and Kirk Cousins.

Win: New York Giants

Bills @ Redskins

Washington is nothing special. They are a team made of Wonderbread—perfectly bland and boring, just like their milquetoast QB. The Redskins making the playoffs would be the worst thing that could happen for the NFC East. At least the Giants and Eagles are mildly interesting. Let’s collectively put our hopes into the Bills pulling off this road win against those Redskins. Of course, we all know this will end with Rex Ryan crying on the sidelines with his foot in his mouth while his team commits hari-kari via penalties.

Win: Buffalo Bills

Falcons @ Jaguars

In fantasy news no one cares about: I started the season with Tony Romo, Le’Veon Bell, C.J. Anderson, and Jimmy Graham—now I’m in the playoffs with Blake Bortles, DeAngelo Williams, David Johnson, and Antonio Gates. Blake Bortles has single-handedly carried fantasy teams down the playoffs stretch. It doesn’t matter if he’s actually any good. People will now give him a Philip Rivers-esque pass because he’s helped thousands of fantasy teams, which of course ends in Week 16 so even the end of the regular season doesn’t matter. The Jaguars could faceplant here against a surprisingly awful Atlanta Falcons team and no one would care unless Blake Bortles doesn’t deliver 20+ fantasy points.

Win: Jacksonville Jaguars

Chiefs @ Ravens

If Brock Osweiler continues to play like his evil vampire twin Robert Pattinson, Kansas City has a serious chance to win the division. The Chiefs just have to avoid the dreaded Andy Reid game where he falls over himself in crucial moments of time management. Meanwhile, the Ravens suck so much that they might put Matt Schaub behind center without being 100%. When the alternatives are Jimmy Clausen and newly signed Ryan Mallett, it’s simply a choice between which turd is the best. Just let each QB play a quarter and then the best performer takes the reigns in the last quarter. Beyond blind luck, I don’t give the Ravens much of a chance even at home in the cozy confines of Bal’more a.k.a. Murder City.

Win: Kansas City Chiefs

Packers @ Raiders

Oakland is as feisty as their head coach Jack Del Rio. But this is a game where Aaron Rodgers should dominate the Raiders defense for an easy victory. Green Bay’s defense isn’t exceptional by any means, but the Packers should post enough point for it to make no difference. I expect the greatest quarterback playing to perform better against this team than Twilight imposter Brock Osweiler.

Win: Green Bay Packers

Browns @ Seahawks

Well John Football fared substantially better than I expected, but can that continue in Seattle against the Seahawks? No fucking way. Russell Wilson will cheese his way to 30 points against this broken Browns team despite having no Marshawn Lynch or Thomas Rawls running the ball. Proving even further that Seattle did not need to lose one of their only good linemen for Jimmy Graham. They didn’t even have a clue how to use him properly anyway. Now this annoying hipster Michael Myers is coming back again.

Win: Seattle Seahawks

Broncos @ Steelers

Brock Stop

Sadly, Peyton Manning might never return to football. With a busted foot (where the remedy for plantar fasciitis is breaking the arch), we aren’t likely to see a healthy Peyton capable of returning for the playoffs. And the Broncos may not be able to reach the playoffs anyway if Brock Osweiler continues to perform like dogshit. Could Robert Pattinson at least act like a better quarterback? Unlikely. Denver’s temperamental defense will be exposed this week for their lack of discipline against the Steelers. I fully expect Pittsburgh to struggle, but ultimately execute better than the Broncos on offense.

Win: Pittsburgh Steelers

Dolphins @ Chargers

Ryan Tannehill against Philip Rivers. What a miserable watch. I’ve never trusted any San Diego running backs since LaDainian Tomlinson, but apparently Melvin Gordon hasn’t even scored a touchdown this year. Both of these teams are pathetic, but Miami has a slight advantage in terms of healthy talent. I wouldn’t be surprised if Rivers pulls a 3-TD performance out of his ass though.

Win: Miami Dolphins

Bengals @ 49ers

The Andy Dalton thumbs up photo last week was the mark of the beast. I just thought it was a funny picture. Apparently, it had the power to doom Andy Dalton and possibly the Bengals playoff chances by injuring his…thumb! I’m not getting enough credit for this voodoo. Cincinnati now turns to A.J. McCarron. While I don’t trust Blaine Gabbert, I would prefer to ride with my homeboy Jim Tomsula than trust that Alabama douche nozzle salesman. I bet Jim Tomsula has 100 different uses for douche nozzles. I’d love to hear the story about how he killed a bear with a douche nozzle.

Win: San Francisco 49ers

Cardinals @ Eagles

Charlie Kelly cannot get out of his own way. The Eagles have no idea how to use DeMarco Murray and Kelly’s vanilla offensive scheme is useless without playmakers. The up-tempo pace has only proven to tire out the Eagles defense, which doesn’t need any help in terms of being bad. Arizona should dominate this game. In fact, if the Cardinals struggle, that should be indicative of larger concerns for Arizona’s hopes of a deep playoff run. Philadelphia is not a team that should pose a problem to a championship contender.

Win: Arizona Cardinals

Lions @ Saints

What a great Monday Night Football matchup. Two QBs people used to think were good but are not any longer—for different reasons. A mishmash of generic running backs that you couldn’t find a great duo even if you combined the teams. Two shitty defenses and an overall lack of playmaking talent. Ugh, who would watch this outside of Detroit and New Orleans? Drew Brees is near the end of his line, but I’d put more faith in Brees than Matthew Stafford and his giant jaw.

Win: New Orleans Saints

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Overall: 128-80
Last Week: 12-4

Cardinals @ Rams

I’ve made the comparison before, but the Arizona Cardinals being The Walking Dead is even more apt at this stage. In their last game against St. Louis, the Rams defensive coordinator Gregg Williams (Gareth) and those vicious, roving lunatics incapacitated Carson Palmer (Bob) and ate his leg right in front of his eyes. Somehow Bruce Arians (Rick) has his gang focused and ready to attack in order to protect their own. Arizona can continue to try to do their best with Drew Stanton (Carl) lofting passes to Larry Fitzgerald (Michonne), but the offense is so limited that the Cardinals need their defense to carry them to the playoffs. Over the next few weeks, the biggest question in this comparison is whether or not the Cardinals have a Daryl. Arizona better win this game because Seattle’s swarming herd comes to town.

Win: Arizona Cardinals

Steelers @ Falcons

Julio Jones won’t play today so Matt Ryan won’t have the mythical centaur to target. Pittsburgh dismantled the Cincinnati Bengals last week and the Atlanta Falcons are arguably a worse version of Cincinnati. Matt Ryan will post points even with Roddy White and Harry Douglas as his prime weapons, but Atlanta will struggle mightily to contain Le’Veon Bell. Whatever Rapistberger gives the Steelers moving the chains through the air will be whipped cream with a cherry on top. Expect Atlanta to try to mount a 4th Quarter comeback before ultimately falling short yet again.

Win: Pittsburgh Steelers

Packers @ Bills

All the hype is building for a Super Bowl appearance for the Packers. Although Green Bay took care of business at home against New England, they’re peaking at the wrong moment. I would still take the Patriots over any team in the NFL because of their ability to run the ball with literally anyone combined with a great defense. In Green Bay, the Packers will struggle without Eddie Lacy and their defense is not up to elite standards. Buffalo has a legitimate shot at an upset if Kyle Orton doesn’t shit himself. But with enough momentum still in their favor, the Green Bay Packers should be able to outscore an Orton-led offense even if the game is on the road in Buffalo.

Win: Green Bay Packers

Bengals @ Browns

Finally, Cleveland has decided to give their offense over to John Manziel. It’s Johnny Clipboard no longer. The move is a week too late and it may very well cost Cleveland their chance at a playoff spot. I don’t know if Manziel is a better QB than Brian Hoyer. But I do know that Manziel’s dual threat ability makes the offense more dangerous by forcing defenses to account for that midget when a play breaks down. Indianapolis would have been a great opportunity to unleash Manziel because the Colts are vulnerable against the run. Similarly, Cincinnati does not do a good job containing opposing running attacks, which means Manziel could open up large running lanes for the Browns’ RBs as well as himself. There will be growing pains and expect at least one turnover, but it will take defenses a few weeks to gameplan against Manziel’s strengths. By that point, the Browns might be able to wrap up an elusive playoff spot.

Win: Cleveland Browns

Texans @ Colts

J.J. Watt’s MVP campaign will continue with end zone opportunities, but Houston’s best chance at a win resides with Arian Foster’s ability to shred Indianapolis on the ground. Likely without Andre Johnson, Ryan Fitzpatrick will be eyeing DeAndre Hopkins all game so the smart gameplan for the Colts is stuffing the box and bracketing coverage on Hopkins. Indianapolis’ defense is smoke and mirrors so there’s an opportunity for Houston to shock the Colts. However, Andrew Luck can look awful for an entire game before pulling a horseshoe out of his ass in the final moments.

Win: Indianapolis Colts

Raiders @ Chiefs

“There’s an old saying in Tennessee (I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee) that says, ‘Fool me once, shame on—shame on you. Fool me—can’t get fooled again.’” — George W. Bush

Win: Kansas City Chiefs

Dolphins @ Patriots

While many thought the Arizona Cardinals were once again the 2014 version of the Arizona Cardinals, which is the best NFL team not to make the playoffs. But the 2015 example might very well be the Miami Dolphins. With a stout defense, Miami plays most teams competitively. However, the Dolphins are desperately missing an explosive element to their offense since Ryan Tannehill is busy doing his best Alex Smith impersonation. In this matchup against the league’s most dynamic offense, the Dolphins needs to use that desperation to score TDs instead of settling for FGs. Despite Miami’s strong secondary, Tom Brady will be blowing kisses to Giselle again after Gronk destroys 7 Dolphins defenders.

Win: New England Patriots

Redskins @ Giants

Coughlin's Red Skin

Remember when a Washington vs. New York division game garnered some attention? At this point, we’re just waiting for the final weeks of RG Knee in Washington. Since this is a December game in New York, Tom Coughlin will play his respects to the proud Redskins franchise with his weathered, bright red face prowling the Giants sideline with a scowl and those beady, Teddy bear eyes piercing the souls of his players. With Colt McCoy pretending to be a starting QB, expect New York to tee off by stuffing the line and daring McCoy’s BB-gun arm to hurt them downfield.

Win: New York Giants

Buccaneers @ Panthers

Cam Newton almost killed himself when his truck turned over, but people still expected him to have an opportunity to play this week. I don’t know if that’s just media ignorance or if Carolina even entertained the idea. Derek Anderson did a respectable job leading the Panthers to a win over Tampa Bay earlier this year in relief duty, but these aren’t the same teams at this stage. Without Cam Newton’s dual threat ability to dismantle opposing defenses, I can’t expect the same large gains available for Jonathan Stewart. In the crazy NFC South, it seems about time for Tampa Bay to step up and ruin someone else’s season for a change. Of course, I wouldn’t be surprised if Josh McCown could also be torn in half at the torso, but I have a feeling that Mike Evans could almost single-handedly win this game.

Win: Tampa Bay Buccaneers

Jaguars @ Ravens

What’s the over/under on when Jacksonville officially give up on the season? Week 3 or 4? I can’t even pretend to conjure up a single reason as to why you should watch this abysmal matchup.

Win: Baltimore Ravens

Jets @ Titans

Jacksonville vs. Baltimore should be a shitty one-sided game. But Geno Smith against Jake Locker will be a showcase of inept QB play where the sole highlight on SportsCenter will be a game-winning FG in the final moments. This is easily the worst game on the Week 15 slate.

Win: New York Jets

Broncos @ Chargers

Peyton Manning’s streak of consecutive games with a TD pass came to an end last week. But the easiest bet in NFL history is on Manning to start a new streak against San Diego. I’m not convinced Denver will move away from the ball-control offensive approach, which is a wise strategy to save the bullets in Manning’s gun while also conditioning the team to win games on the strength of their defense. Denver’s defense still isn’t elite and I wouldn’t put them in the same category as New England because they don’t have a secondary that completely dominates and shuts down the opposition. As much as I will yell at my TV screen, Philip Rivers will make plays on 3rd Down and have a fair share of connections downfield with the likes of Antonio Gates. While this be a more competitive opponent than Buffalo, the Broncos need to take care of business on the road with a workman-like approach.

Win: Denver Broncos

Vikings @ Lions

So Teddy Bridgewater probably isn’t the best QB from last year’s draft class. But the tools are there to be a competent QB for several years. At the worst, Bridgewater is a slightly better version of Christian Ponder. While Minnesota fans may never Adrian Peterson in a Vikings uniform ever again, Bridgewater brings a new face of the franchise. Unfortunately, the supporting cast isn’t in place yet for Minnesota to surprise a playoff contender like the Detroit Lions. Matt Stafford seems to have righted the struggling Lions ship with Detroit posting 30+ points in consecutive weeks. As long as Detroit plays their brand of defense, Stafford should be able to get away with a win even if the offense takes a step back.

Win: Detroit Lions

49ers @ Seahawks

It would be such sweet revenge for San Francisco and Jim Harbaugh if the 49ers shoved a stick in the spokes of Seattle’s season with a surprise upset. Unfortunately, Colin Kaepernick has regressed into a shaky scarecrow in the pocket. With the train back on the tracks for Seattle, expect the Seahawks to force Kaepernick to be successful from the pocket. If Daddy Long Legs can rewind the clock and be an elusive running threat again, then San Francisco has a chance in this defensive battle. But I hate Russell Wilson and I cannot be allowed to enjoy things so we’ll Seattle in the playoffs yet again.

Win: Seattle Seahawks

Cowboys @ Eagles

Could Dallas truly implode and ruin their odds of making the playoffs? The increasing probability of the Cowboys sitting at home watching the playoffs instead of participating in them is so tantalizing. My mouth is watering at the thought? Would Jon Gruden finally return to the sidelines if that collapse happens? As interesting as a Jon Gruden-Jerry Jones marriage could be in Dallas, I think the Cowboys will run the ball more effectively with DeMarco Murray in this rematch against Philadelphia. Chip Kelly needs to bring the kitchen sink, and I surely have more faith in his coaching ability than Jason Garrett. But can I really take Mark Sanchez in an important game over Tony Romo?

Win: Dallas Cowboys

Saints @ Bears

Dysfunction in Chicago has reached a cataclysmic level. The radioactive poison in the locker room will cost Marc Trestman his job as head coach, but it’s yet to be determined if the Bears will continue to swing favor in Jay Cutler’s corner. At this point, Cutler is the type of QB he will always be—Smokin’ Jay isn’t changing. Despite New Orleans’ Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde routine, the Saints are too strong on offense to fuck up this opportunity to squeak back into the playoff hunt with an upcoming game against the Atlanta Falcons. Chicago rallying to win this one at home might be the shock of the season.

Win: New Orleans Saints

Last Week: 13-3
Overall: 134-73-1

Chargers @ Broncos

The AFC playoff picture is a jumbled puzzle, but the primary puzzle piece is the Denver Broncos. Now it’s just whether or not the rest of the puzzle must go through Denver for the playoffs. I’ve been waiting for the Broncos to stumble all season because the Denver defense is just no good. Starting the year without Champ Bailey and Von Miller, there was some slight hope that Denver could get healthy and make an impact once they have their full complement. But Champ Bailey hasn’t been able play in more than a handful of games and Von Miller can’t terrorize opposing offenses all by himself. Although I was banking on Peyton Manning to continue his reign over division foes, I was not surprised to see San Diego flawlessly execute their offensive game plan and keep the ball away from Manning. If not for stupid defensive penalties, the Broncos would have had 7 more minutes in the 4th quarter to secure the win.

Win: Denver Broncos

Redskins @ Falcons

Mike Shanahan is down on his knees begging to be fired. Regardless of the company line, there’s no reason a healthy RGIII should be benched for the final 3 games of the season. It is inexcusable. And it’s going to backfire on the Redskins—making Mike Shanahan’s face a darker shade of red. Kirk Cousins isn’t without talent, but I don’t think he’ll play well enough to warrant a higher draft pick if Washington decides to trade him this offseason. This can only end bad. If Cousins falls flat on his face in these final 3 games, it degrades his trade value and virtually guarantees that the St. Louis Rams will draft No. 1 with Washington’s draft pick this season from the RGIII trade. For the record, I was not around for my Fantasy Football draft and the computer auto-selected Robert Griffin III as my QB.

Win: Atlanta Falcons

Bears @ Browns

Cutler

The Return of Smokin’ Jay! I may have had a noose around my neck by being handicapped with RGIII as my Fantasy Football QB, but I’ve still found my way into the Semi-Finals powered behind the surge of Josh Gordon. And now, I’m a riverboat gambler going all in with Jay Cutler. In what’s mostly an uninteresting national match-up, I will be glued to the TV to see the performances of Jay Cutler, Josh Gordon, and Jordan Cameron. Hopefully this is a shootout with deep passes launched downfield. But if the Bears get a comfortable 10-point lead, they’ll deflate the ball and pound Matt Forte against Cleveland’s defensive line.

Win: Chicago Bears

Texans @ Colts

Gary Kubiak is gone. Matt Schaub is still there though. Houston is a mess right now, and I imagine the Texans just want to end this season as soon as possible. With nothing to gain from winning this game aside from upsetting their division rival, the Houston Texans should just be jockeying for draft position at this point. Indianapolis is still playing wildly inconsistent football, but the division is locked up and the Colts just need to grind and stay competitive. The focus in this game should be shutting Ben Tate and the running game down, which would force Houston’s incompetent quarterback to win the game by himself.

Win: Indianapolis Colts

Patriots @ Dolphins

With Denver losing to San Diego, this is a prime opportunity for the Patriots to step up and claim the No. 1 seed for the playoffs. But New England took one step forward and then two steps back with the loss of Rob Gronkowski. Fortunately, the Patriots still have a dynamic playmaker in Shane Vereen who is monstrous as a pass catcher and mediocre as a running back. Miami will struggle to match up well with Vereen, which could be the deciding factor in this game because the Dolphins lack any such difference-maker. The only hope I give Miami is a Christmas miracle where the offensive line protects Ryan Tannehill long enough to connect on a few game-changing downfield passes to Mike Wallace. That’s it.

Win: New England Patriots

Eagles @ Vikings

The 2013 season for Minnesota has been a year of retarded musical chairs at the QB position. And now, the Vikings will be without running backs Adrian Peterson and the dopey white wonder Toby Gerhart. Minnesota could be spotted a 10-point lead, and they’d still find a way to mismanage the game and fumble the win away. Chip Kelly is finally hitting his stride and there’s no way he allows Philadelphia to lose. Expect a ton of safe passes from Nick Foles to support heavy running from LeSean McCoy and Bryce Brown.

Win: Philadelphia Eagles

Seahawks @ Giants

Well, the public was right last week and I was wrong…by only a slim margin. San Francisco had no business beating Seattle last week, but it was a fairly predictable stumble on the road for Seattle against an always tough divisional opponent. Don’t expect a repeat this week. The Giants have found no stability this season and New York needs to keep Eli Manning healthy through the end of the year. There’s a sliver of a percentage of a chance that the Giants can keep competitive, but I don’t envision a scenario where Seattle turns the ball over enough to gift New York a win. Expect Marshawn Lynch to maul the Giants.

Win: Seattle Seahawks

49ers @ Buccaneers

Greg Schiano still has a job and the Buccaneers are playing cagey football. Tampa Bay is a muddled huddle on offense each week, but Schiano has the defense playing tough week in and week out. San Francisco is riding a nice high off a home win against Seattle, but Tampa Bay is a bad match-up since they have the requisite speed to contain Kaepernick. If the Buccaneers had a healthy Doug Martin and a stable quarterback, I would bet on Tampa Bay to upset San Francisco. Despite Mike Glennon’s occasional competent stretches, I don’t see the necessary points appearing on the scoreboard for the Buccaneers unless they can generate 3 turnovers on defense.

Win: San Francisco 49ers

Bills @ Jaguars

Seriously? No one in Buffalo or Jacksonville will even watch this game.

Win: Jacksonville Jaguars

Chiefs @ Raiders

Kansas City’s ceiling is limited, but that doesn’t mean the Chiefs aren’t good. It just means that they can’t be a truly elite team at this point. Andy Reid has done wonders with Alex Smith this season, which is nothing new since he’s transformed the recent careers of the likes of Michael Vick, Kevin Kolb, and Nick Foles. Oakland doesn’t have the same guru working on their side, but they do have comparable talent with Matt McGloin and Terrelle Pryor. Unfortunately, those Raiders quarterbacks are career back-ups at best. If Oakland can force Alex Smith to make some mistakes, then the Raiders stand a chance to control the ball and the game because of Kansas City’s limited offense.

Win: Kansas City Chiefs

Jets @ Panthers

Rex Ryan could finally be fired this year! While my hatred for Rex Ryan should be fully established by now, I do not have the same hatred for Rob Ryan—defensive coordinator for the New Orleans Saints. But the problem for both of the Ryan brothers is that they are defensive coordinators. How much more of a sample size do you need to come to the conclusion that Rex Ryan is not capable of creating the components for an above-average offense? Rex Ryan can sure coach up a defense and overachieve. The Jets are simply asking too much of Rex Ryan. If you can pair a strong defensive coach with a creative offensive mind, then that NFL team might actually stand a chance. Carolina is threating to do the same with Rivera on defense and Shula on offense. The proof is on the field as the Panthers have been playing out of their minds with a cast of mediocre players on offense surrounding Cam Newton. Time will tell if that’s enough during the playoffs, but it’s certainly enough for this game against the Jets.

Win: Carolina Panthers

Packers @ Cowboys

Aaron Rodgers still isn’t starting, which means we get to watch Matt Flynn struggle to throw the ball more than 10 yards. This is a perfect storm for a potential rebound for the Dallas defense, which was horribly embarrassed by another back-up quarterback last week. If Tony Romo loses this December game, then expect the national heat to ratchet up another notch. The fact remains that the Dallas Cowboys will always suck as long as Jerry Jones is making the decisions. What Cowboys fan wouldn’t welcome back Bill Parcells with open arms at this point?

Win: Dallas Cowboys

Cardinals @ Titans

Finally getting his first opportunity, Bruce Arians is not garnering enough attention for what he’s doing in Arizona. We all know Carson Palmer is not good and Rashard Mendenhall has never made a difference since entering the NFL. With a great defense, the Arizona Cardinals aren’t asking Carson and Co. to do too much. If Tennessee had more than a mediocre back-up like Ryan Fitzpatrick, then the Cardinals would be the template that the Titans should hope to emulate. It’ll be interesting to see how Tennessee handles the offseason because you could be looking at a Wild Card playoff team next year. Good luck getting there with Mr. Harvard.

Win: Arizona Cardinals

Saints @ Rams

Jeff Fisher is a hell of a coach. After pulling the trigger on the tough RGIII trade, St. Louis could potentially change the entire direction of the franchise. And best of yet, the Rams don’t have to actually try to tank because their draft pick is tied to the sinking ship that is the Washington Redskins. New Orleans is operating at maximum efficiency offensively so don’t expect a slipup in this match-up against the Rams. The Saints will need to stuff the run and put the ball in Kellen Clemens’ hands for the win.

Win: New Orleans Saints

Bengals @ Steelers

With Denver stumbling, all of the national hype has focused squarely on the Cincinnati Bengals as the team everyone favors for their tough defense and consistency through a turbulent season. But be careful, the Pittsburgh Steelers could easily defend the ketchup at Heinz Field. Pittsburgh almost pulled off the comeback last week against the Dolphins, and they’ll want to make their mark in the Sunday night match-up. If the Ginger Gunslinger can’t run ‘n gun his way to a win, then the Bengals will likely be another one and done in the playoffs. My expectations are thoroughly lowered without an impressive running game to support Andy Dalton.

Win: Cincinnati Bengals

Ravens @ Lions

Despite the blizzard conditions last week, Detroit completely broke down and lost in embarrassing fashion against the Philadelphia Eagles, which was expected considering the awful coaching from Jim Schwartz. Baltimore could be clicking at the perfect moment again, but the Ravens will face an uphill climb to get into the playoffs. Dennis Pitta’s return could be a difference-maker offensively, and he did score the deciding touchdown last week in a crazy finish. For at least this week, I’ll ride the roller coaster of the Ravens.

Win: Baltimore Ravens